any state of a mind is ephemeral. there is learning, there is growth and change.
what i believed in yesterday no longer holds today,
what i believe in today shall no longer hold tomorrow,
what i would believe in tomorrow would one day vanquish.
everything undergoes transformation. the marked aspect is the relative degree of change. so, some things change drastically while some undergoes wafer-thin change.
How Level of Information affects Thinking -
When i was a child, I & my younger brother had an impression that a TV costs about 2-3 lakhs(whereas it must have been less than 1,000 at that time! :-)) children, aren't they sweet. So, we used to wonder that we might not be able to purchase a TV all our lives. n end up doing the rounds of our neighbours. it sounds funny today, but man did it gave us a scare then.
How Level of Perception affects Thinking -
People more than loved my eyes. They used to find it simply irrestible till i got bespectacled. And this raving public adornment made me fastidiously attach to my eyes. At the age of 11, when i suddenly discovered that i've -3.5 it brought my world crushingly down. I had the feeling as if the entire world is sinking. If i can't see straight, how can the world survive? The world would come to an end!!!
I cried invariably every night for months. Poor God. He must have had to hear the cliched 'Why me?' for atleast a million times over a few months. apart from the sobs n complains. I behaved as if i was facing polio, heart-attack, heart-break, death all rolled into one. :-))))) but, then its said of children, they always exagerrate their experiences. Their imaginations can run amok. It took me a few years to accept the fact that i can't see clearly with my own eyes. after those initial turbulent times, i just developed a different perspective, 'People with specs always looks smarter' & that was it. I found my happiness back. Since then i became fond of my bespectaled look.
It still remains like a dream....being able to see with my own eyes, but it no longer is a dissapointment. And God, i love my eyes. that is one part of my body i fiercely love. but, today the world doesn't seem to come crushing down on me. thankfully for god, otherwise he would have to again tolerate that non-stop jabbering from me. :-))))
I think this was the issue that i had taken most sensitively throughout my childhood/teenage. what seemed the worst thing to happen to me in my first 15 years of life, seemed just a way of flaunting the intelligent look with the specs in the later years.
How Level of Maturity affects Thinking -
I have always been blindly faithful to truth. For years i believed in truth, truth and nothing but the truth. Be it bitter, be it harsh, be it harmful. I still believe in the same. Infact, i think it took me about 15 years to lie for the first time in my life! 'Be Truthful n hurt OR lie n comfort' - this has been perhaps debated for centuries. There is no change in my beliefs - I have always believed in the former & i continue doing so. but, since past few years my ideology has diluted on the front of 'timing.' For years i thought a lie for 1 second was sin, since a few years i feel i must wait atleast for a few minutes when the issue is delicate.
Level of Change -
Its obvious that the level of change was drastic in the former 2 cases and minute in the latter one.
But, still change is must. Perfection is an illusion, just as life itself is an illusion.
